This NLP technique allows you to stay resourceful when you’re criticized, whether it’s at home at work or with friends.

This enables you to use criticism as feedback to improve your relationships.

1. See yourself, in front of you. That self in front of you is going to learn a new approach to criticism, while you watch from the outside. Do whatever you need to do to feel detached from that self. You can see that self farther away, in black & white or behind Plexiglas, etc.
2. Watch & listen as that self gets criticized and instantly dissociates. There are several ways that self can surround him/herself with a Plexiglas shield when criticized. Or, that self can see the words of criticism printed within a cartoon balloon, etc. That self uses one of these methods to keep feeling neutral or resourceful.
3. Watch as that self makes a slide or movie of what the criticizer is saying. What does that person mean? Does that self have enough information to make a clear, detailed picture? If no, gather information. If yes, proceed…
4. Have that self decide on a response. For example, that self can agree with any part of the criticism that you agree with. Or, that self could apologize, saying, “I’ll give it some serious thought”, or, “I see things differently now”, etc.
5. Does that self want to use the information you got from the criticism to act differently next time? If so, have that self select a new behavior. That self will then imagine using the new behavior in detail in the future. Next, that self can step into this movie of using the new behavior to feel what it’ll be like.
6. Having watched that self go through this entire strategy, do you want this for yourself? If no, ask inside how you can modify this strategy so that it fits for you. If yes, continue…
7. Thank that self for being a special resource to you in learning this strategy. Now pull that self into you, feeling him/her fill you so that this knowledge becomes fully integrated into you.

For more NLP techniques, read the NLP Toolbox Review.

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This entry was posted on Friday, June 22nd, 2007 at 12:59 pm and is filed under NLP. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.